There is the breakdown at the store. I know it isn’t the first or the last. I know he isn’t trying to torture me. But I am tired and want to get home. I can guide and preach. However, can I always follow my own advice? The majority of the time, yes. However, there is no perfect parent! The balance of positive and disciplining is a true struggle. The never ending give and take balance of it all. The bargaining of life.
My key to anytime I am dealing with my tiny humans (I parent like I teach. I also love my class like they are my own) is make it about them, not me. Focus on the message being sent through their actions and behavior. But I am human, and sometimes I want it to be about me. Sometimes I feel their pain and want to throw myself on the floor and scream too!
My biggest struggle in this parenting adventure is to remember I am not only mom; I am a strong woman, a wife, a sister, an individual who had has her own needs. Guilt is a heavy feeling that I don’t think any parent hasn’t felt. That overbearing guilt that makes you question am I doing this, right? But maybe we are asking the wrong question. Shouldn’t the question be; am I doing the best I can?
Is there a balance between all the roles of a parent, and still being you? I am sure there is. However, I don’t believe I am even partly close to gaining that balance. I have been raising a free spirited, “wild” little boy for two years now. I have been teaching little ones for seven. Another little boy on the way. They are my priority in everyday life. My wind down for the night is “did I do the best I could to guide those amazing minds to greatness”?
Luckily my husband embraces my passion and supports me beyond expectation. So being the wife is made a little easier with that kind of support. I should remind myself to save a little bit for him. I must remind myself that he works, and is a parent too. So, my biggest support for him is to stay in touch with his hobbies and activities. Which I can be bitter about at times because of guilt. Not his fault I didn’t open my mouth and say, “I could use a little me time.” I think dads are over looked in the huge scheme of things. But, they have the same struggle as us moms and are trying to balance just as much as we are.
Taking me time is the biggest struggle that I have faced. To remember that I need to step back and be me if I am going to be the best for them. This I am not sure I will ever be able to master. The second you get alone time your mind goes racing. You spend it either talking about those little humans or worrying about them. At least that’s me.
So is there any real way to achieve balance? I am sure there is. However, it will be an ever-ending teeter-totter for me. A balancing act that will ever be in motion. I am also okay with that. Life isn’t always easy but it is always an adventure. One I feel blessed to be on.
“A good life is a collection of happy moments”- Denis Waitley